Watching the novel coronavirus spread and destroy the economy reminds me a lot of 2008. I was graduating college for the first time and the world around us was on fire. We’d been told that a college education ensured you would find a good job and have a steady middle-class life, but there I was with a philosophy degree, working night shifts alone at a local hotel, getting paid slightly above minimum wage, and sharing a house with five people.

Things eventually worked out, but that’s only because of a safety net made of white middle-class privilege which allowed me to quit that job after several unfulfilling years, and go back to school for a new degree, in a different field, in a far away town, which had real work opportunities at the ready.

So, as the spring semester winds down, and break lasts two weeks so schools can figure out how to finish the semester digitally, I wanted to write up some thoughts and refine an overall message to graduating seniors, since I’ve been where you’re heading…

You are graduating into a hellscape you couldn’t have imagined or planned for; your family and friends will make attempts to console you, but it will only contribute to the levels of anxiety and mental anguish you are feeling. You will feel like a failure, like this is somehow your fault, but in a lot of ways, if not all of them, your parents caused the problems you are now struggling though (their generations wreckless policies and politics are why we live in a corporate oligarchy after all). And as you look for work that doesn’t exist, and apply to job openings overwhelmed with applicants, there will be a rising anger that boils up from within.

You were promised a career for all this work you put in; the sleepless nights, the long hours, the projects and tests and finals… they were supposed to conclude with a diploma and if not a career, at least a job. You will hear that “things will work out” and to “hang in there” a lot, but as others get frustrated with your situation, they will start asking for proof you’re even applying, and it will be hard to give definitive proof because you’ll mostly hear radio silence, occasionally punctuated with a simple form letter thanking you for your time. Even spots like Burger King and Walmart will have no fallback for you, because they’ve got options and would prefer someone who needs the money to live and support a family, vs a college graduate looking to fill a gap until something better comes along.

It’s okay to be mad at your support system for not understanding. It’s okay to feel a low level of resentment for your friends that do find work. It’s okay to feel like a failure for something outside of your control. And you’re right, you were lied to; by your family, by your college, by the system. While others were able to graduate with a diploma and job waiting for them, its fucked up that’s not the case for you. But do not bury that anger, don’t let it build quietly within to the point you explode and lash out, hurting those around you. Instead you need to feel it, process it, and use it in some kind of semi-productive way so you can manage it. Write, draw, paint, sculpt, find something to help get it out of your system, because it’s toxic to hold it in.

And not like the Brittney Spears song which is still a bop 20 years later, like an acid that will eat you alive.

Find people who understand and use each other to keep your spirits, if not up, at least level. Don’t just throw pity parties, but don’t be ashamed when you do. Console each other, send jobs to the group when you find them, and help each other find mentors if possible. Don’t hoard good resources for yourself, share them and celebrate when someone makes it through to the other side. And if you’re that person who makes it out, remember to pay it forward and not lose patience with your friends who are still searching and struggling.

Maybe I’m overreacting and 2020 won’t be that bad, but for some of you it will feel as awful as 2008 did for us older millennials. Know that we are out there and want to help. When we try to relate to your struggle don’t blow us off completely, no we don’t know exactly what you’re going through, but we know what we went through and it scarred us for life; we will be trying to help in whatever broken ways we can.

We’re living through the death throes of democracy and late-stage capitalism all at once. Things will probably get worse before they get better. But keep your heads up as high as you can and try not to succumb to the numbness and depression that will be biting at your heels.

We’re in this together. You will make it through. Let us know how we can help. And, I hate to say it, but hang in there. Things will work out, someday.